


Feel Your Way to Me

by runandgo



Series: if you can’t have original unholyverse, store-bought is fine [2]
Category: Bandom, My Chemical Romance
Genre: (kinda-sorta), Clothed Sex, Fluff and Smut, M/M, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Porn with Feelings, Religion, Religious Content, Rimming, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Unholyverse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-13
Updated: 2020-05-13
Packaged: 2021-03-03 01:55:50
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,455
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24156979
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/runandgo/pseuds/runandgo
Summary: Frank looked at him almost unreadably from under his hair, tilted his head to the side as he struggled up onto an elbow. “I wanna try something different,” he said, pensive in a way that told Gerard he’d been thinking about this for a while. “I don’t want you to think too much. You get trapped in there sometimes.”a little uhv pwp with a healthy dose of fluff, because writing so much yearning made me pent-up for cute romantic stuff.
Relationships: Frank Iero/Gerard Way
Series: if you can’t have original unholyverse, store-bought is fine [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1730128
Comments: 33
Kudos: 113





	Feel Your Way to Me

**Author's Note:**

> not really much to say about this one - i just really love writing uhv frank and gerard and it made me sad to not get to any real love moments between them. ergo, this. i couldn’t decide if this was worth posting, but i thought i’d put it out there in the end as like a reminder to myself that not everything has to be a huge sweeping epic of a story — and i love them so much i couldn’t resist.
> 
> takes place after the end of original uhv, in case that wasn’t obvious. sorry for writing out of order if i ever decide to do another long fic, but i really needed some actual frerard content. you don't need to have read uhv to understand this necessarily though!
> 
> since this is short and just porn, it’s unbeta’d, and any mistakes are my own :)
> 
> don’t put this anywhere people in it might see, thank you!

“Absolutely not.”

Gerard frowned, peering at the watch on the inside of his wrist -- it was pretty dark in here, when did that happen? “It’s not that late, Frankie, I just need another twenty minutes.” 

“That’s what you said two hours ago. Come on, it’s time to go home.” Frank pushed off from the doorway where he’d been standing, arms folded, and walked over to the desk. “You’re dead on your feet.” 

“No I’m not,” Gerard defended, clenching his jaw to fight off the yawn that threatened to break through. 

“You’re so lying,” Frank said cheerfully, leaning his hip against the desk and reaching out to stroke Gerard’s face with a thumb. “I’m hungry, let’s go.” 

“You’re always hungry,” Gerard huffed. His resolve was weakening, though, and he closed a hand over Frank’s wrist, leaned into the touch a little. 

“Gee.” Frank looked him in the eye with a soft smile on his face; he was really turning it up. His eyes were huge and so sweetly brown in the low light of the back room. “Put the book away, c’mon.” 

Even though Gerard knew that Frank was using his powers for evil, he couldn’t resist. “Okay,” he sighed. “You’re right.” 

“Haha! I win.” Frank pulled his fist down in the air and spun around in a victory lap. 

“You take so much joy in manipulating me,” Gerard said, but he couldn’t make himself pout properly, not when Frank smiled like that. 

“It’s for your own good.” Frank took his hand and pulled him close, out of his chair, drawing the other arm around his waist, pressing his lips to Gerard’s neck. “And mine. You wake up in the middle of the night if you spend too much time reading at that tiny fucking desk, you hunch over like a vampire, it’s gotta be shit for your back.” 

Gerard shivered and tilted his chin up, knowing full well it would encourage Frank. “It’s not so bad.” 

“Oh, yeah, you must just be getting old then.” Frank bit down, just barely, but definitely noticeable, and Gerard could feel him grinning. 

“We’re still at work,” Gerard said, a little breathy, but he didn’t pull away. 

Frank made absolutely no effort to move away either, instead kissing along the line of Gerard’s jaw. “No one else is here.” 

Gerard held out for a few more seconds before stuttering out, “Okay, okay, let’s go home.” 

A laugh came from low in Frank’s throat as he obligingly let Gerard out of his arms, and Gerard could feel him watching as he closed the books and swept his sheets of notes into a file folder. It was maybe a little more haphazard than he usually would have left it, but his mind was somewhere else entirely. It was a little bit embarrassing how easily distracted he was by Frank, but that was nothing new -- what made that distraction worth it was the complete and utter lack of guilt he had to feel about it now. It was a shiny, new feeling, and it made Gerard’s mouth dry sometimes, the fact that he could look and look and look at Frank and not have to hide it anymore. 

From the doorway, Frank flipped the lightswitch, leaving Gerard blinking in the sudden lack of artificial lighting. The room was lit up in orange and pink from the sunset as Gerard made his way to the door, and the light only increased as they walked into the main room with its wall of windows. The air outside was still warm, one of the first real warm days they’d had this year, and Frank turned his face into the sun and crinkled his nose at it happily as Gerard fiddled with the keys. Together, they drew the grate down (Frank was just a little too short to grab it himself, but he always jumped to try and catch it) and locked it, then walked over to Frank’s car, where he took the opportunity to kiss Gerard again, sweet, leaning up against the window. He tasted like Coke, the bottle he’d drank sitting in the recycling outside the shop as evidence. 

When they broke apart, Gerard laughed -- a petal from the falling cherry blossoms had situated itself on top of Frank’s head, like the tiniest crown. He plucked it off and offered it to Frank on a fingertip, who blew it into the breeze, then smiled at Gerard. “Okay, get in the car, I was serious about being hungry.” 

They stopped at a Wawa on the way home and ate hoagies and potato chips sitting in the parking lot, because Gerard had been overtaken by the kind of hunger that only rears its head when you’ve been focusing on something else for much too long. Frank let him talk about the case they were working on, and then the only tangentially-related research hole he’d fallen into, for a good while, and then changed the subject. He was good at that, easing Gerard out of work, even when Gerard — he could admit it to himself — sometimes tried to bring it everywhere with him. When they made it back to Frank’s place, the sun was fully down, the stars just starting to rise. Gerard grabbed Frank’s hand as soon as they were out of the car, and they didn’t let go, even though it made Frank take twice as long to unlock the door with his left hand. 

Inside, Frank took a running jump and landed sprawled on the couch with a loud complaint from the springs, then opened his arms to Gerard, who walked over and nestled himself in beside Frank at a normal speed, thank you very much. Their lips met again, but this was Frank asking a question without words. Gerard answered by deepening the kiss, opening his mouth so Frank’s tongue could slide in. They made out for a few more moments, kind of sloppily, and when they broke apart to take a breath, a string of saliva connected them. Gerard couldn’t decide if that was hot or gross. 

He could feel Frank half-hard through his pants, against Gerard’s knee, and reached for the hem of his shirt, but was met with a hand wrapping around his arm instead. Surprised, Gerard looked at Frank. He was gorgeous like this, his lips a little swollen, his pupils blown. “Why do I always have to be the naked one?” Frank asked, partly joking, but partly serious, too. 

Gerard paused to consider this question, drawing his eyebrows together and sitting back into a kneel over Frank’s legs. “I like to look at you,” he said thoughtfully. He rucked Frank’s shirt up just a little so he could brush a hand over the bird on his left hip, and felt the muscle tense under his touch. “Your tattoos, the way they look against my skin. You’re so beautiful, Frankie.” 

“And you’re not?” Frank countered, arching an eyebrow, although Gerard could tell he was straining to hold back a shudder. 

“It’s not really that,” Gerard said. And it wasn’t that he was self-conscious, exactly — he was, but that didn’t really make a difference most of the time. It was good for keeping his focus, staying in the moment, to be covered up. “I just… It helps me think.” 

Frank looked at him almost unreadably from under his hair, tilted his head to the side as he struggled up onto an elbow. “I wanna try something different,” he said, pensive in a way that told Gerard he’d been thinking about this for a while. “I don’t want you to think too much. You get trapped in there sometimes.” Illustrating, he knocked gently on the side of Gerard’s head. “Just feel. Yeah?” And his fingers tiptoed around Gerard’s waistband, pulled his shirt out from where it was tucked into his pants to stroke the soft skin there. 

Gerard let his eyes flutter shut. The touch was light, almost ticklish, but like everything Frank did, it drove him half-crazy with wanting. The hand crept further up, laying over Gerard’s lower belly. “Okay?” Frank asked, and Gerard nodded quickly, jerkily. 

There was more creaking from the couch as Frank sat up, and then his hands both went to Gerard’s collar, undoing the tie, throwing it somewhere else in the room. Gerard made a noise of distress, and Frank laughed. “Gee, it’s fine. It landed on the TV, I’m not gonna lose it.” 

The fact that Frank knew exactly what was bothering Gerard before he even said it made Gerard smile. He made quick work of the buttons on Gerard’s shirt, then brought it back over his arms. Gerard resisted the urge to learn in and curl over on himself, instead biting his lip and keeping his eyes shut as Frank ran a hand gently over his torso. “Fuck, Gerard.” His voice was scratchy, rough with desire. “Do you know how you look like this?” 

Gerard could feel himself flushing, down his neck, almost to his chest. Frank went on, low, quiet, his thumb ghosting over Gerard’s ribs. “Your skin is so soft… I just want to touch you and touch you and touch you, I want to taste you.” And to demonstrate, Frank leaned in -- Gerard felt hot breath -- and scraped his teeth on him, lightly. 

Shuddering, Gerard let out a breath through his nose, reaching blindly in front of him. When his hands met Frank’s t-shirt, he closed them around the fabric, not wanting to lose him in the sensation that was rising, blocking everything else out. He couldn’t stop his hips from moving, jerking forwards a little against Frank’s knee. 

“Tell me what you want,” Frank said, almost directly on his skin. 

“Kiss me,” Gerard said, and finally opened his eyes to see Frank under him, looking up with something close to wonder on his face. 

Frank pushed himself up a little further on the arm of the couch and cupped Gerard’s face in both his hands, then kissed him, bruising, hard, passionate. Gerard put one hand on the back of Frank’s neck but kept the other fisted in his shirt, pulling him closer until their bodies were flush against one another. 

“See, you just gotta ask me,” Frank said, breathless, and broke his hold on Gerard’s face to pop the first button on his pants. “Can I touch you?” 

“ _Fuck_ , yeah,” Gerard sighed, ran his fingers through his hair as he let go of Frank just so he’d have something to do with his hands. 

The contact was sudden but familiar, warm and a little rough with calluses, and Gerard tried to keep his mouth closed, but he couldn’t stop himself from crying out, moving into the touch. “Come on, I wanna hear you,” Frank said, his head leaning on Gerard, his other hand wrapped around his waist, keeping him steady. “Look at me, baby, look at me.” 

Gerard’s stomach tightened at that, and he couldn’t resist, he looked down to meet his eyes. “Like that, yeah,” Frank breathed, twisting his hand, making Gerard arch his back. “ _Shit_ , Gerard, just like that.” 

The hand on Gerard’s waist urged him upwards, off the couch, as Frank broke their contact and started sliding his pants and underwear down, off his legs. With as much grace as he could muster, Gerard hopped out of them, kicking them off and then grabbing them off the floor to toss them out of the way as Frank stretched the effect of making out on the couch out of his back. “Now how does it feel?” he asked, and Gerard could practically feel Frank’s eyes raking over his skin, drinking him in, as if he were really touching him. 

“Exposed,” Gerard answered, the first thing that came into his mind, as Frank crossed the room to stand in front of him. 

“Bad or good?” Frank said, his expression not changing, just focused. 

Gerard took a breath in, and let it out, battling the instinct to hunch over on himself. “I don’t know yet,” he said honestly. “Just different.” 

“We can work with that,” Frank said, and kissed Gerard, backed him up until the back of his knees hit the couch. They both went down, Frank leaning over him until every inch of Gerard was pressed against every inch of Frank, with the blanket over the couch beneath him and the rough scratch of t-shirt and jeans above him. He rolled his hips against Frank’s leg, just once, just to try it, and the friction was so good, he kept doing it as they kissed, his tongue sweeping over Frank’s lips until he opened his mouth to let him in. Frank slid a hand under his back and urged him more fully onto the sofa, then crawled on top of him, started licking down Gerard’s neck. “I love you,” he said to Gerard’s pulse, lips moving a fraction of an inch away from the skin, close to the spiderwebbing scar that was still visible on the side of his throat. “I want to make you feel good.” 

“You are,” Gerard sighed, tried not to wrap a leg around Frank. It was so much, in the best way, and Gerard was pretty sure he could come like this, just grinding himself against Frank, with his mouth on his neck, his head spinning far away. 

“What can I give you?” Frank asked, between presses of his lips. “Tell me what you want, Gerard, tell me how you want me.” 

“I can’t… I don’t know,” Gerard said breathlessly. His mind was racing what felt like ten paces behind his body like this, every cell of him electrified with feeling. He couldn’t sort out his thoughts into anything cohesive, and he usually just kept his mouth shut when he felt that way. 

“I think you do,” Frank murmured. He rubbed little circles into Gerard’s hip, where his thumb rested. “I think you’re thinking too much about not thinking. Come on, I want to know.” 

Gerard hitched out a laugh and let his eyes slide shut again. “You know me way too well.” 

“Yeah, yeah.” Frank mouthed over his collarbone wetly, smoothly. “You love it.” 

“I love you,” Gerard pointed out, his fingers sliding up over Frank’s back and the back of his neck to travel through Frank’s hair. 

“Don’t distract me,” Frank said, though it came out as more of a groan as he pushed into the touch. He bit down again, not enough to hurt, just enough to send blood rushing to the surface of Gerard’s skin, to take off that edge of too much thought that had started to creep back. 

Gerard whined a little and tried to move his hips again, but Frank’s hand stopped him, stilled him. He made a frustrated noise. “Frankie, please.” 

“Please what?” Frank asked, and even though he was trying to hide it, his voice was thick, his eyes so dark and heavy as he looked down at Gerard below him. He couldn’t keep this up forever, he’d eventually break and give in, but until then it was a battle of wills. 

“For f-fuck’s sake.” Gerard rolled his eyes even as his words stumbled on their way out of his mouth and he stretched his neck to press more into Frank’s lips. 

The smirk against his skin was the only warning before Frank was touching him again, and it was such a relief, so sweet, that Gerard felt his whole body relax — until just like that, the touch was drawn away, and Gerard was left bucking his hips into the air. 

“Come on, use your words,” Frank coaxed, and if he didn’t have such a shit-eating grin on his face he’d sound the picture of innocence. 

Gerard was strong, and Gerard knew what he wanted, and Gerard had not been planning on divulging any fantasies today. But he was a human being, prone to all the messy things that came along with it, and his body occasionally took over his brain. So he opened his mouth, because he could stand this for only so long — sex with Frank felt like a wonderful privilege, it would probably always feel like that, and Gerard had very little resolve simply by virtue of the fact that little resolve was required anymore. 

“Eat me out,” he said breathily, tilted his head back onto the arm of the sofa, and he felt the color spread all the way down from his cheeks to his neck to the top of his chest. 

Above him, Frank went completely still, and Gerard couldn’t meet his eyes for a split second. “Yeah,” Frank said, and brought a hand up to Gerard’s chin to turn his face towards him. “ _Yes._ ” 

It was halfway to praise, and it sent a warm, delicious feeling to the bottom of Gerard’s stomach. They kissed again, like they were gasping for air, like they were starving, desperate for nothing except each other. The pure want of it rolled through and over Gerard, covered him completely in a wave that threatened to pull him under. And from the way Frank held the nape of his neck, from the way his hands trailed along Gerard’s side as he got up towards the bathroom, he knew he felt it too. 

* 

Gerard settled with his elbows propped on the cushions of the couch, kneeling on the carpet. Frank was beside him, one hand steady on his waist, his mouth on Gerard’s lower back, tongue swiping over the divots at the base of his spine. “You’re okay?” 

Gerard shivered and tried not to tear a hole in the blanket from how hard he was gripping it. “Yes, yeah, Frankie, I’m okay, just --” He couldn’t help it, he wriggled a little bit under Frank’s tongue. “Please.” 

A long, low breath out that Gerard _felt_ , cool across the wet trails left on his skin. “Yeah,” Frank said, his other hand coming up and trailing along the curve of Gerard’s ass as he moved to be fully behind him. He spread him open, as gently as he could but still with that tight, burning feeling attached, and for one second Gerard held his breath, surrounded everywhere by air, with Frank’s fingers a millimeter away from where he needed them. 

Then Frank put his mouth on Gerard, and Gerard heard himself moan out loud, in a way that he couldn’t have controlled even if he’d tried. It was wet and messy and perfect, and Gerard arched into it and tried not to completely ride Frank’s face, but he had more or less lost control of his body, sinking his teeth into his own arm just to mitigate some of the feeling. 

Frank came up for a breath and replaced his tongue with two fingers, and Gerard sank back on them, chasing that feeling, keeping the pressure building in his stomach. “The only thing I don’t like about this is that I can’t fucking _see_ you,” Frank said, strained. “Because you look so good like this…” He reached forward, his other hand coming up onto Gerard’s back, rubbing unconsciously. “Here, get up on the couch.” As quickly as he could make his body obey his brain, Gerard did, and Frank walked on his knees until he was right up against the front of the couch, looking up at Gerard. “Okay, grab the back of your knees, get ‘em as close to your shoulders as you can.” He sat up a little out of his kneel to get Gerard into the right position, slouching him down a bit further, sliding a pillow under his back so it wouldn’t cramp. “Is that okay?” While waiting for an answer, he attached his mouth to Gerard’s thigh, sucked a bruise into it. 

Gerard tried to say something in return, but it came out as a whine more than a _yes_ , and Frank laughed, low and warm, before licking into him with a wide, flat stroke. It made Gerard’s toes curl up, his legs shake a little, and he let go of the backs of his knees to throw his arm over his face and clenched his fist so hard his fingernails dug into his palm, his mouth hanging open, his eyes shutting of their own accord. From below him, there was a clinking sound, a belt buckle, and then skin-on-skin, and Gerard realized Frank was jerking himself off, fucking into his fist without missing a beat or pulling away. He could feel the rhythm of Frank’s strokes jolting through his whole body, from his hips all the way to his mouth on Gerard, and it made him dizzy, the togetherness, like it always did. He felt light-headed with it, like he could never get enough air, breathing ragged and deep. When the next roll of Frank’s body came, Gerard pushed back, felt Frank moan against him. 

This time, when Frank pulled away, he was even faster to move his fingers, three this time, slipping inside Gerard easily. In front of himself, Gerard could hear Frank’s breath coming in short pants, and when he’d gotten enough air to speak Frank asked, “You think you can come like this?” 

Gerard bit his lip and moved his hips a little, as much as he was able to, trying to get the right angle, so full but not quite there yet. With Frank’s mouth on him, though, it would be enough, he knew from the way the hot flare of pleasure was building at the base of his stomach. “Uh-huh,” he gasped. His thighs were starting to tremble with the effort of holding them up, burning, but he was at that point where he didn’t even mind, where it even felt better because of it. Every sensation was a good sensation. 

Like a reward, Frank crooked his fingers and Gerard cried out as they brushed against his prostate, his hips jerking, his cock twitching where it was pressed up against his stomach. Masturbation was pretty great but it could never compare to this, of having someone bring you almost to the point of orgasm without even touching your dick. Also, Gerard was quickly figuring out that Frank was really fucking good at sex; even in his limited experience, it had been like this every time, even when they both ended up laughing or they bonked heads or something like that. This may also have been a function of having sex with someone he loved. 

Then Frank was licking him open again, his fingers still moving, and Gerard lost the ability to form coherent thoughts amid the warm, wet pull of it, the way he was surrounded. In shallow strokes, Frank’s tongue was dipping in and out of him, next to his fingers, still keeping up a rhythm that Gerard could have followed if he hadn’t been almost completely washed away in the feeling of it all. He was dimly aware that his mouth was still hanging open, his forearm pressed to his sweaty forehead and his hair getting wet, and he could hear himself making sounds that were something between swearing and gasping, with Frank’s name thrown in there a few times for good measure. 

When Frank started moving a little faster, his own strokes speeding up and getting sloppier, Gerard reached down to curl a hand loosely around himself, he couldn’t help it, he was so close. On the next downbeat, Frank grazed Gerard’s prostate again, and that was it. Gerard shook from the top to the base of his spine and came into his hand, up and over his stomach and his chest, around Frank’s tongue and fingers, little spots popping up behind his eyes as his thighs trembled and gave out, sagging fully down onto Frank’s shoulders. 

“Oh, _fuck_ , Gerard,” Frank bit off, his face shining where he’d pulled away, and then moaned, mouth falling open, and Gerard could tell he had gone over the edge too, could see his body moving and his hips stuttering weakly into his hand and his head rolling back on his neck. 

As soon as Frank had started to breathe again, he moved his hand to rest lightly on the outside of Gerard’s leg, just sitting there, a warm point of contact as they both panted their way down to earth again. Gerard felt like his legs had dissolved, like if he tried to move them off from where they rested laid over Frank’s back they’d completely fall to pieces. Instead, Frank was the one to move them, lifting them gently so he could pull his shirt over his head and wipe his hand on it, then pass it over to Gerard. “Now our laundry tally’s gonna be at least a little more even,” he grinned, balling it up once Gerard had finished with it and hopping fully out of his jeans, then piling them all at the foot of the couch with Gerard’s crumpled clothes. 

Gerard was still staring up at the ceiling, trying to move as little as possible for fear of disturbing the way his body felt right now, the way Frank had made him feel. “Scooch down,” Frank said, reappearing and arranging himself and Gerard so they were both squished onto the couch together. Once he was satisfied, half-sitting with his back against the arm and Gerard’s head on his collarbone, he looked down at him, and frowned just a little. “Hey. Are-- are you okay? Did you, I mean, did you like it?” 

Blinking, Gerard shook himself out of the daze he’d been in. “Frankie, of course I did. Of course.” He rolled onto his stomach as much as he could so he could look Frank in the face. “I was just -- I don’t know.” For a second, Gerard hesitated, then said truthfully, “I was thinking about what the Catechism says about sex.” And it was a testament to how far Frank had come that he didn’t roll his eyes or snort, he just drew his brows together and chewed a little on the inside of his cheek, something that showed Gerard he was really listening. 

Carefully, Gerard reached up and pushed Frank’s hair off of his forehead, felt the raised bumps of his scars underneath his fingertips. His hair was getting long, longer than it had been in a while. “It says that sex -- well, conjugal love -- it’s a totality. It involves all of a person. Their feelings, and their body, and their spirit, molding with those of another person.” Frank’s eyes shut, and he let his head tip the smallest amount into Gerard’s hand. His chest rose and fell beneath Gerard, comforting, steady. “I always remember that phrase because it’s so huge, it’s all-encompassing, and when I was a priest, it kind of felt like that wasn’t real, you know? I mean, I knew it had to have existed in the abstract.” He let his hand move, down along the side of Frank’s face, his cheekbone, the sandpaper of day-old stubble. “But most people, I think I just saw a lot of bodies being involved and not much else.” 

“This doesn’t happen all that often,” Gerard continued. “But I was so totally, utterly, completely fucking wrong.” Frank laughed, and Gerard felt it more than heard it, his mouth curling into a smile and his shoulders shaking a little. “Because every single time we have sex, I give you everything. I couldn’t hold it back if I tried. And I know you’re doing it too, I can feel it. I can feel you. I _know_ you. It goes beyond ‘you complete me’ or any of that bullshit, it’s like… like I’m something _more_ when you’re with me.” 

Frank’s free hand came up and closed around Gerard’s wrist, and he brought Gerard’s hand to his mouth and pressed a kiss to his palm. His eyes were open, shining. “I love you.” 

“So fucking much,” Gerard said, and pushed himself up to brush his lips against Frank’s, lightly. They brought their foreheads together and just breathed for a few minutes, and it was like they could feel the world turning around them, like they were the locus for the gravitational pull of each other, inexorably together. 

“Should we get up?” Gerard whispered, wriggling a little so he was less pressed up against the cushions. He could feel the gold cross around his neck getting sweaty from being trapped in between them. 

“Oh my God, just give me a second,” Frank murmured, and even though he had just been looking upwards, lost in thought, Gerard could see his eyes roll. “I’m trying to save this nice moment in my head.” 

“Okay, okay.” Gerard fell silent briefly, but then he couldn’t stop himself. “Did you ever think that maybe the reason my back keeps hurting is because we keep having sex and then falling asleep on the couch--” 

“You’re fucking unbearable,” Frank told him, sitting up as Gerard scrambled backwards off of him. “You know that?” 

“So I’ve been told,” Gerard said happily. “I’m getting in the shower first.” 

“Oh, are you?” 

“Yeah, my boyfriend told me I need to get more sleep, so I think I’m gonna try to head to bed early.” 

“Oh, well, I wouldn’t want to argue with a smart guy like your boyfriend,” Frank griped, but the huge smile on his face that had been there for the last ten minutes kind of ruined the effect. “Can you at least throw these clothes in the washer on your way?” Gerard collected them as he tumbled off the couch. From behind him, he could hear Frank fumbling around with something, probably his jacket for his cigarettes, and when he heard the rolling click of a lighter he knew he was right. 

Crouching down briefly, Gerard threw their discarded clothes in the washer, then stood back up, stretching his back, feeling the muscles settle out of their burn. The floor was cold under his bare feet on the way to the bathroom, but he could hardly tell, still so wrapped up in the good feeling flowing through every part of his body. 

People liked to say that they got lucky when talking about their significant other. Gerard knew luck had nothing to do with it. And every time he told Frank how much he loved him, every time they made love, every time he saw Frank sleeping next to him, it hit him over and over again, knocked the breath out of him, how God’s plan had brought them together. How God knew what was best for Gerard even when Gerard thought he could never have it. 

The shower was warm and strong on Gerard’s back, and he leaned on the tile, his legs still a little unsteady underneath him. He let his hair get good and wet and the heat of the water put some strength back into him before reaching for the shampoo. “I wanted to start by saying thank You,” Gerard began, squeezing his eyes shut against the bubbles. “I know I always start like that, but I just have so much to thank You for. Frank, mostly, Lord, thank You so much for bringing him into my life. He proves me wrong in the best ways possible every single day.” He closed his mouth briefly as the water flowed down over his face, rinsed out his hair, then went on, looking upwards -- it was a habitual thing, even though obviously God was no more in their bathroom ceiling than He was anywhere else. “And I love seeing him grow in Your purpose, you know? It’s like, every day we both learn more. We both get stronger.” 

He talked for what felt like way too long, letting it all spill out of him under the hot steam, every so often brushing his fingers across the gold chain of his cross, until the water started to run a little colder and he jumped out so Frank wouldn’t be left with a freezing shower. Gerard could be a babbler sometimes, in prayer and out of it, but thankfully God didn’t care. And Gerard just had so much to be thankful for, he couldn’t keep it inside. 

Towel in hand, he stepped out of the shower to a knock on the door. “Hey, come on, I got out the ice cream,” Frank said, slightly muffled through the wood. 

Gerard had to cover his face with his towel because he was smiling so hard. _I found him whom my soul loves._ In the little moments he felt it more than ever. “I’ll be right out.” And just because he could, he added, “I love you.” 

From behind the door, he heard the footsteps in the hallway stop. “I love you too,” Frank said, and Gerard could tell from his voice that he was smiling.

**Author's Note:**

> okay i said this was going to be short and i wouldn't do any research for it, but then i did anyway, i can't resist, lol. i hope you enjoyed it -- thanks so much for reading, and if you feel so inclined, consider leaving kudos or a comment; they make my day :~) i'm at [@heavenhelpsus](https://heavenhelpsus.tumblr.com) on tumblr if you want to chat about this, uhv in general, or really anything! i'm terminally online in the face of quarantine, lmao. hope you're doing well, wherever you are and whatever's going on. <3


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